I am NOT ready for Kindergarten

I'm not ready for kindergarten. Carter is ready, but I am most certainly not.

I have never ending list of questions questions. What does she need to bring? Who will her teacher be? Where is her classroom? Should she bring or buy lunch? Why can't he use is beloved Spiderman blanket instead of a beach towel? Why am I buying bottles of soap? If he does bring lunch, how will he ever remember his "secret code"? Should he walk or take the bus?

We have an open house next week that will hopefully answer all of my questions, but will more likely just bring to light a bunch of new queestions I haven't even thought of yet.

I am a work at home mommy. Carter has been exposed to daycare since he was 6 months old. He typically has been in part-time daycare which means about a 5 hour day. Perfect for the Kindergarten schedule which is a 6 hour day. We have our choice of either a full day program or a part day program in our area. I thought it best to go with the full day as it is the most similar to his current daycare schedule.

Over the years we have experienced many transitions, from full-time to part-time to mommy full-time to preschool. This transition is different, this one is permanent and marks a major milestone in his life. This is the day my baby becomes an official boy there is no more denial. He's going to school. No more let's skip daycare on Friday and go to the park. No more vacations in September (not like we ever did this, but for some reason this year we started to plan one until I had an oh sh*t momment. We can't vacation in September, Carter will be in school. My husband of course does not see the conflict. In his opinion, he's our son and we can pull him out whenever we want. I had to have the nice lady at the school registration office explain how school absences work to him.

I never thought this would be an issue. When I talked about Carter starting school, it got me excited. It's just as it looms closer that the panic has started to embrace me. Experienced parents tell me how normal my panic is and that it will pass.

The problem is not with Carter, he'll be fine. He loves meeting new people and learning new things. I could never come up with enough projects to keep him busy. I do have the smartest boy on the planet (mommy pride talking) and he needs new challenges. For the first time in his little life, he'll be independent of me. This is the first step of him growing into a little man, a teenager, a college student, an independent person.

I am thrilled for him. I will miss him deperately. I am extremely proud of him. My baby, the boy.

Multi-tasking Mommy

I have taken multi-tasking to the highest level. I run my own business, take care of two boys, and have taken on a full-time consulting engagement through the summer. I even try to squeeze out 5-6 hours of sleep a night. I start my consulting job by 6 AM, am home sewing at 2 PM, pick up the boys at 4:30 PM, cook dinner and settle the boys in for an hour or so, and then sew up until the boys go to bed and go back to sewing after they are sleeping until 11 or midnight.

In reality, I don't want to work the consulting job, but I have taken it on to get my husband off my back about cashflow. I have truly worked my butt off to get my company off the ground, but it takes a while to get the income back up to my husband's comfort zone. Unfortunately, I have always been an over-achiever and I was very successful in my previous life as a financial manager. It spoiled my husband and he got too used to me being the primary income maker. After I had the boys, I no longer wanted to do the travel that my job entailed so I decided to consult. Consulting has been very good for me... I pick the jobs I want, I have a flexible schedule, I can see my kids grow up.

When I was put on bedrest with Brady, I saw that life could be more than just working hard and I could actually do something I enjoyed full-time. My husband just cannot understand enjoying what you do for a living as a concept. He comes from a line of working grunts who hate what they do and complain about their jobs non-stop. I am trying to ease him into the idea that running your own business can actually be better than just making a lot of money... it could be fun and something we can grow as a family. Someday I believe he will come around... until then I consult by day and sew by night. Who needs sleep anyway?

Thankfully this gig is almost up since I've been covering for a new mom as she enjoys her maternity leave and she's due back in two weeks and then I can focus all my energies back into the parts of my life I enjoy a lot more than dragging my butt into an office at 5 AM!

Binky Update

The battle of the binky continues...

Brady has actually done fairly well with the "no public binky" rule. He has even given his binky special spots in the house and the car where he stashes binky when we need to go out. We go out have a fine time, but the second we step back into binky territory it goes immediately in his mouth. It is time to end the binky habit!

I am giving Brady two more binky glorious weeks and then the time will come to dispose of all binkys. This of course coordinates with Carter starting kindergarten so I have a distraction from the realization that my baby is growing up too fast.
If the removal of the baby bottles serve as an indicator, this will include some type of midnight run to target, babies r us, or some other retailer to buy an emergency binky after he has a meltdown on a day when I'm not up to the battle, but that is what husbands are for. Daddy will ultimately save the day, I'll be mean mommy, and he'll come to give up binky when he's ready. (Hey he's potty trained at two so I've already won one battle!!)

Totally Cool Vintage Inspired Stuffed Animals

You may have noticed by now that I love handmade items and items with a vintage feel. I have learned with my boys that a toy doesn't need to have all the bells and whistles to be a favorite. In fact most of the noise makers get played with for 5 minutes only to be disgarded for the boy of blocks, "Junior" the teddy bear, or just a pan with a spoon.



I immediately fell in love with these knitted stuffed animals that remind me of a stuffed monkey that I had when I was little. I'll have to check with Grandma and see if she still has it to share with the boys!! Until I can find it check blablakids.com for great vintage inspired knits.

The Butterfly Garden

Carter loves butterflies! There is nothing like the look of sheer amazement when he spots one and takes off after it. Last year we bought him a monarch butterfly caterpillar and let him take care of it until it turned into a monarch butterfly which he released in the fall to fly South to Mexico. Everytime he sees a Monarch flying he knows in his heart of hearts that it is his Monarch flying home to see him. He chases behind them with such joy that you can't help but smile and watch!

For some reason yesterday there was a ton of them swarming our yard. It definitely helps that I have gardens everywhere with flowers to attract them. The boys spent the afternoon chasing butterflies through the sprinkler around the backyard. I got to spend a couple leisurely hours sitting in the sun reading a book and watching them play around me. I wouldn't have missed it for anything.

The Boy and The Bull Shirt

Ok... I'm not adjusting very well to the idea of my "baby" going to Kindergarten. I know we'll both love it when the time comes, but where did the last five years go? I've been drowning my sorrows in my one true indulgence - shopping!!! And lots of it. (The boy has been growing like a weed and needs a complete new wardrobe.)

After a massive shopping trip to my favorite store for boy's clothes - Old Navy, I came home with a shopping bag full to the top of new clothes. Now Carter loves new clothes, he really does and he promptly but on a full scale fashion show for the family with each new outfit bringing a bigger smile.

We got to the bottom of the bag and reached my last minute purchases - you know the third t-shirt that you tossed in to get the discount price. Anyway all of the sudden Carter's little eyes welled up and he started to cry. The final shirt was a yellow t-shirt with a picture of a bull. (The kid has loved bulls since we went to Montana to visit my parents last summer and he saw some in a rodeo.) I asked him what was wrong and tells me "Mommy you remembered. This one is my favorite. You're so cool!!"

So at least for today, I'm cool in the boy's eyes. I'll take it!!

Breaking the Binky Habit

Neither of my boys has been big on binkies. We tried them with Carter and the were literally projectiles that he would launch from his mouth to the wall across the room. Brady used them a little when he was a newborn, but we never let him make a habit of them. When Brady was having difficulty adjusting to daycare, his doctor advised us to try a binky to help him sooth himself. We did, it helped some but time was the real key for that adjustment.

What it did do was create a big attachment to binkies at the age of two. If it were up to him he would have one in his mouth 24 hours a day. Of course, his doctor says it's fine and that he'll break himself of the habit when he's ready. His doctor has never stood in line at the grocery store or the post office facing the disapproving stares of previous generations mother's (aka - grandmas that will tell you at a drop of a hat how their babies were toilet trained at 18 months old).

So one of these helpful women starting giving me "advise" in the grocery store the other day. A day in which I had worked 10 hours starting at 5 AM and was now trying to navigate getting the evenings groceries with a pre-schooler and toddler and still keep a remnant of my sanity. Now normally she would get a polite "Thank you for your advise" and fake smile. Not today... we'll just say she'll probably mind her own business next time she wants to dole out unwarranted advise.

Anyway before I need to have another run in with a well meaning stranger, the time has come to break the binky habit. Regardless of the tears that ensue everytime we leave the house, Brady is limited to binky use on family property only and we will soon be moving to quiet time and bedtime only.

I must be strong. Poor boy has been through alot of adjustments in the last couple of months, but breaking the binky habit is a necessary step and we'll both make it through it.

Elmo is my Homeboy

Ah, little Brady is potty training. The best thing about potty training for him is the picture of Elmo playing soccer on the training pants. This is cool to a 2 year old. He takes great joy in digging out the perfect pair of Elmo pants from a pack of 76 trainers.

As soon as I saw this t-shirt, I had to order one just for him since Elmo is his hero!

Check them out at Uncommonly Cute.